I have the long weekend off. I was supposed to run at least 5K on Saturday. I put it off because my legs ache from two 12-hour shifts on Thursday and Friday. I think I need new orthotics in my work shoes. So, I figured I could run Sunday and Monday - take advantage of the long weekend.
Sunday comes (today) and I don't run. I have no excuse. I'm not busy, overtly tired, hurt, aching, injuries, no seizures, no headache, weather is fine - no excuse. I am disappointed in myself. I thought I was better than that.
Really, if you get down to the core of the disappointment, I am afraid that once it happens once, it will keep happening until I stop running all together. I love running. I love the freedom it gives me. I love the feeling it gives me. I love the sense of accomplishment it gives me. I love the knowledge that I can do anything - after a life of not being able to do so much due to epilepsy. How can I give all that up?
Tomorrow is another day. I have to just chalk this couple of days up to rest days or "mental health days" and just go back to it. How can I not? I owe it to myself to keep going.